These past four or five days have been so weird. It feels very similar to a bad mushroom trip. I unconsciously sense beings around me. I have memories I never had. A couple of times, I even caught myself inside a story, and the moment I became aware of it, I forgot the entire story.
It is an uncomfortable situation because I don't know what is going on.
If you have read my previous articles, you know that I had surgery on both of my legs about three and a half weeks ago. The recovery has been arduous, especially since I'm not at home. Gabe and I traveled to Vietnam about two months ago, and we are still here.
Lately, because of the intense itching and the feeling of electric shocks running through my legs, I haven't been able to sleep. I am very sleep-deprived, and my body is still in shock from all the work it has to do to heal both the external and internal wounds.
Long story short, I am not quite sure what is causing these bad-mushroom-trip sensations. But I also have a feeling that something in my behavior is shifting.
I am becoming more aware of my judgments. I am beginning to see that these judgments are not really my own ideas. They seem to come from somewhere else. A source that I have seen operating in some people I know.
I can now recognize the same patterns in my mother, my grandmother, my grandfather, my sister, my friends, and myself. They are all so similar.
How is it that we all carry the same judgments? Are they learned? inherited? Or are they simply there, available for every human being to pick up?
I don't know the answer to that.
What I do know is that I am deeply grateful to be able to sense these judgments as they arise and recognize that they are not my own thoughts.
Anyway, I hope this bad mushroom trip comes to an end as soon as possible, but that I get to keep this new way of seeing.
Good night,
Somewhere in the middle of the woods, Vietnam
June 7th, 2026